A different assessment can help you accept better

01. Try to look at yourself and others more comprehensivelyLearn to look at and recognize a person as a whole, rather than judging a person on the basis of his or her "performance in a particular situation". For example, you are usually very patient with your friends, but today you have had a lot of bad luck and are very irritable, so you are very mean to your friends. But that doesn't mean you are a mean person, it just means that you are "mean when you are in a bad mood, but overall you are still a gentle person". When we learn to evaluate the whole person, we won't be overly anxious because of our temporary, intermittent negative state.

02. Try to look at the "shortcomings" in a new light. Make a list of traits or behaviors you don't like and try to find their strengths. Remember that as situations change, some "problems" may no longer be problems, but rather strengths. For example, if you don't like being "aggressive" but would be an advantage if you were to become a lawyer, or if you don't like that you pay "too much attention to detail," maybe try a part-time job as a proofreader. Sometimes it's more important to find the right context than to change in vain.
03. Ask yourself the right questions When you are confused about a certain trait or performance, don't ask "Is it normal?" or "Is it bad? When you are confused about a trait or performance, don't ask "Is it normal?", "Is it bad?" and other labeling questions. Instead, ask more descriptive questions, such as how it makes you feel. For example, in my life I often encounter people asking sex-related questions: "Is it abnormal for me to f**k three times a week?" In fact, rather than asking "Am I normal?", it's more appropriate to ask yourself "Am I suffering because of it?"

04. Replace the unrealistic "standard of perfection" with a "good enough" standard First, we need to realize that perfection does not exist in the world. People grow by realizing their mistakes and shortcomings, and there are always things that are beyond their ability to fix. Pursuing unrealistic goals can be a waste of time. Instead, try to learn to celebrate being "good enough" when facing the parts of yourself that you feel dissatisfied with. See the effort that has gone into it, and the strengths of the dissatisfaction.

05. Actively reach out to people who are different from you Trying to find people who are different from you in some way can help develop an open mind. The more you come into contact with different people and see their lives, the more you realize that the world is heterogeneous and that there is more than one way to live. People who have been single for a long time can be happy, and shy introverts can have affectionate friends. ...... And when you are confronted with anomalies or shortcomings in yourself and others, you can be more relaxed: it's okay, you can find a way to live anyway.